I pushed my man into the arms of another woman.
Not my husband, this is someone from my past.
I want to share this story with you because this is something that I was speaking to my Feminine Allure Academy clients about last week. We were talking about powerful and feminine communication secrets, and really, how to just state your desires purely, versus coming from manipulation and control as a way to get what you want and making an obligations and demands.
What happened was that we were in the car, and he left, and left his phone in the car. I went through it. I really had no reason to go through it. There was a hole in my heart, right? I was a woman full of skepticism and fear… fear of abandonment, fear of infidelity.
I went through his phone just to sort of preempt, to make sure that everything was in order and that there was nothing… that I wouldn’t find anything. I went looking anyway. I saw a picture of him pretty close to a woman with his arms really close.
I was thinking, “Well, he doesn’t hold me that way. What’s going on?”
I asked him about it. I asked him about the photo, and I also saw some texts. I don’t remember exactly what it was, but it was something about at looking forward to seeing her again, or holding her close, or something like that.
When I asked him why, you know, who is this woman, and why, one of the things that he shared with me, what he said, and I felt like this was really heartfelt, was that he said that he was practicing. He was practicing with her, because it seemed as though he couldn’t make me happy.
It was almost like an episode of Martin, where Martin didn’t wear his wedding ring while he was at the gym because he wanted to see if he still “had it”, and he lost his ring.
In that moment, I really felt small and contracted, because he was speaking truth. I know that I did not have the skills to speak to a man in way that really empowered him, and really put him in choice to give me what it was that I wanted.
Instead, I criticized in hopes that it would change behavior.
I’m being vulnerable here and really sharing this story with you. I’m hoping that maybe this is something that you can identify with too.
I didn’t know how to edify. All I knew was that if I wanted to make a change and if I wanted him to change, not necessarily be a better person, but really to be a better person for me, is that I would point out what I didn’t like, and what he was doing wrong.
Naturally, that would chip away at his spirit and that would create a spirit of inadequacy and defeat.
To make a long story short, that relationship ended a couple years after that.
Now, I’m proud. In between that moment, I had to study because this wasn’t given to me or modeled for me.
This is why Feminine Allure™ is so important to me because I struggled with it.
I had to study this and groom myself to be the woman who is of influence and Feminine Allure™.
The language of Feminine Allure™ is just about showing up differently in the world, so that people respond to you differently.
You see, I was so skeptical and controlling that I would say things that weren’t nice in hopes that it would change behavior. That doesn’t work because as you can imagine, people don’t typically respond to that.
And so, I remember having a conversation with my now husband. He wasn’t my husband at the time, but remembering what that ex told me about, you know, really not being able to please me, or make me happy. He wanted to try it out with another woman.
I remember speaking to my husband and he was telling he was going to hang out with some friends. And, he was on new trajectory in his life. Rather than going into the “Ergh, Ergh, Ergh, Ergh”, and the, “you don’t need to be doing that, da, da, da, da, da,” I just said, “Be careful with that.”
I left it at that. I didn’t go into convincing. I didn’t go into control.
In that moment, he just looked at me and he said, “I like the way you said that.”
In that moment, I was awakening his masculine need. I was awakening the power within him to make his own decisions and to really trust his own capacity to be the man that he had expressed himself… that he was vulnerable enough to express to me. I wanted to hold that that information and not use it against him, and not abuse our relationship.
I’m saying this to say that you can become queen of a man’s heart.
I had gone from not knowing what to say to a man because I was this broken woman and I didn’t have the skills, to becoming a woman who is extremely empowered, and who knows how to empower her man through language and through words. This is how you become queen of his heart. It’s actually one of the ways that you can become queen of his heart.
By activating that masculine need, activating the God in him, seeing his good, and defining a man’s good, when you do that he associates you with good things. He associates you with his growth, with his prosperity, with his upward mobility. Okay?
Of course you have to discern that this is a good man, this is the person that you want to give to. You don’t want to give and not have anything in return.
I just wanted to share that quick story with you. If you want to learn how to become queen of a man’s heart, that’s something I can help you with.
I’m accepting new private clients who have a desire to change and want to work with me for the next year. I’ve opened my calendar to speak with you.
If you have been following me for some time and you’re tired of the same ole, we can have a conversation to see what’s keeping you stuck and how to get you forward.
I have a 6-step approach. It’s the exact method that I used to own my femininity, to restore that part of me, to attract the right man, and to create a purposeful, amazing, magnificent, passionate, and peaceful relationship, marriage that I have today.
If you want to know how and have a framework that’s safe and accountable to get you there book your no-obligation Breakthrough Call and let’s see how we can get you to where you want to be.
To your enhancement,